Meesha Shafi's lawyer slams 'episode of male tears', rallies support for 'survivors'

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Nighat Dad speaks at TEDGlobal 2017. Image: Digital Rights Foundation

KARACHI/LAHORE: Singer Meesha Shafi's lawyer Nighat Dad late Sunday night criticised the latest "episode of male tears", drawing similarities to notorious alleged sexual abusers such R. Kelly and Brett Kavanaugh, the then-nominee for the post of the associate justice of the US Supreme Court.

Dad stressed on the prevalent difference of perception about men and women showing emotion in public, saying the society would call women victims and survivors "'hysterical' or 'unstable' or using 'Women Card'" if they "become emotional or angry at any point during their interviews or media trial".

Dad further went on to highlight that while Meesha Shafi has had a gag order placed on her, the "privileged man accused of sexual harassment" goes on live television to talk about what he is supposedly going through.

"If anyone has earned the right to cry today, it’s thousands of survivors around us who were forced to watch a privileged man accused of sexual harassment and whine because he has access to media while victim has gag orders against her."

The lawyer also underscored how those who are accused of sexual harassment or assault "make it seem like it's the accused who are hurt the most".

"From today’s episode of male tears to R. Kelly's to Brett Kavanugh’s you will find a stark similarity. […] Also more TV shows are planned and coming your way in coming days while survivor can’t utter a word in her defence."

Ali Zafar breaks down during live show

Earlier in the day, Ali Zafar broke into tears while speaking on Geo News programme Naya Pakistan about the sexual harassment allegations against him.

Speaking to host Shahzad Iqbal, Zafar had said Shafi had made a claim against him but asserted that the court's verdict came in his favour, adding that a social media campaign has been launched against him now.

Zafar had said several big companies, who hired him, were tagged in the posts, along with the United Nations’ agencies, so that his career can be ended.

He had alleged that Shafi wanted to immigrate to Canada but he did not know why she had made the allegations in the first place. In response to Ali, host Shahzad Iqbal highlighted that Shafi’s Canadian PR had been approved in 2016.

“I don’t know why she is doing this… one should ask her. She should come to the court herself and reveal her true intentions," he had said, adding that Shafi was a good friend of their family and had attended various functions with them.

Zafar noted that two women were also present at the alleged place of harassment and that Shafi had also sent him a message after the event, which he showed to the court as well.

Zafar inquired if Shafi was harassed then why did she send a message which said: “Had a great time jamming and performing. Grateful for the kind word Ali has to say on stage.”

Zafar claimed that he was innocent and that the court had also dismissed Shafi’s allegations. He also spoke against the derogatory language being used on social media against him and his family.

In a message, he extended an olive branch to his acucser, saying whatever was happening was not good for the society. He added that he did not want the money from the defamation suit and would give it to a charity for women, asking Shafi to bring the issue to an end.

“We have both known each other for a long time. My kids have played with yours. I still urge you to block out all voices and just isolate yourself and connect to God and end this. If you take one step forward, I will take ten steps forward.”

‘Even if Ali lets it go, I will see it through’

Jumping to her husband’s defence, Ayesha Fazli also posted on social media that the criminal cruelty the family faced cannot be described in words.

“The cyber bullying & betrayal by friend(s) has been a big eye opener. Even if Ali lets it go, I will see through it. #FaceTheCourtMeeshaShafi,” she had tweeted.

Last year, Zafar had filed a defamation suit against Shafi, who had accused him of sexual harassment. Filed under the Defamation Ordinance 2002, it claimed damages worth Rs1 billion.

In the notice, the singer had claimed that Shafi had damaged his reputation through false allegations of sexual harassment.

'#FaceTheCourtMeeshaShafi'

On Saturday, Shafi's lawyer Dad explained that singer Meesha Shafi "has not been called by the court as of yet" but "will go once court will direct her to" appear.

Dad was speaking on Geo News programme Naya Pakistan in response to singer Ali Zafar's comments outside a sessions court in Lahore when he had claimed he was being targeted through an organised plan for personal gains.

Dad, who is part of the legal team representing Shafi in the defamation case filed by Zafar in response to allegations of sexual harassment made by Shafi, had refuted the assertions he made and said the propaganda was, in fact, against the survivor.

The campaign, she had added, was under the hashtag "#FaceTheCourtMeeshaShafi".

When show host Shahzad Iqbal had asked the lawyer about why she follows what he claimed were suspicious accounts, Dad had said: "I follow any account that supports Meesha Shafi and her cause. I retweet tweets posted in favour of Meesha Shafi and her cause."

However, "if Ali Zafar believes that an account is fake, he can go ahead and lodge a complaint," she had added.

In a tweet on Saturday, she had also explained that the "other party to the case uses mainstream media and online spaces to spread misleading narrative around the case and viciously calls [Shafi] liar" whereas it was ironical that the survivor "has a gag order against her under defamation suit" and, thus, "can’t talk on mainstream media & social media about the case".

Dad had also questioned on Twitter whether "all other accounts came forward with harassment allegations [were] fake too".

"Meesha has not been called by the court as of yet, she will go once court will direct her too. Why lawyers are there? To represent her client," she added.

Men and showing emotion

Back in March, it was reported that Grammy-winning R&B singer R. Kelly denied sexual abuse charges against him and had broken into tears while saying he was fighting for his life when being interviewed by CBS This Morning co-host Gayle King, who had inquired about allegations that he had sex with women under 18 and that he was physically and verbally abusive.

“Not true,” he had responded, which was confirmed by a transcript of the excerpts from the interview available to Reuters. As the interview went on, the singer had grown visibly angry and emotional, turning to make his argument directly to the camera.

“That’s stupid. Use your common sense,” he had said. “Forget the blogs, forget how you feel about me,” Kelly had yelled.

“Hate me if you want to, love me if you want. But just use your common sense. How stupid would it be for me, with my crazy past.”

Pounding his chest for emphasis, Kelly had shouted, “I didn’t do this stuff!” His voice had cracked and he broke into tears, saying: “This is not me! I’m fighting for my [expletive] life!”

Judge Brett Kavanaugh testifies to the Senate Judiciary Committee during his Supreme Court confirmation hearing on Capitol Hill in Washington, DC, US, September 27, 2018. Win McNamee/Pool via REUTERS/Files
 

Prior to that, on September 27, last year, Brett Kavanaugh — a conservative federal appeals court judge chosen by US President Donald Trump for a lifetime job on the top US court — had testified to the Senate Judiciary Committee over allegations that he had attacked Dr Christine Blasey Ford and tried to remove her clothing at a gathering of teenagers when he was 17 years old and she was 15.

Dr Ford, a psychology professor at Palo Alto University in California who testified first and was by herself in the hearing, had told the Senate Judiciary Committee that she had feared Kavanaugh would rape and accidentally kill her during the alleged assault in 1982 when both were high school students in Maryland.

Dr Ford, who spoke during a four-hour-long testimony, had said she was “100 percent certain” it was Kavanaugh who assaulted her.

Kavanaugh, who had appeared later and testified after his accuser had finished her appearance, on the other hand, had claimed that he was the victim of “grotesque and obvious character assassination”.

“I will not be intimidated into withdrawing from this process,” Kavanaugh had said. He had, at times, choked back tears, especially when he had mentioned that his daughter suggested they pray for Dr Ford, when he had spoken of his father, and when he had noted women friends who had rallied to support him.

“I swear today, under oath, before the Senate and the nation, before my family and God, I am innocent of this charge,” Kavanaugh had said.

“In those 10 long days, as was predictable and as I predicted, my family and my name have been totally and permanently destroyed by vicious and false additional accusations,” he had said, as his wife sat behind him.

Kavanaugh also went a step ahead to say he wished Dr Ford “no ill will”.